Episode #81:

How to make space in our days and lives for what matters

December 15, 2022

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Episode #81: How to make space in our days and lives for what matters

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About the Episode:

How many times have you said "later" to something that would bring you joy? Or "not right now" to a simple act of kindness, like a hug or a cuddle.

Life is short and can be uncertain. In this episode, we talk about how you can start making space for what truly matters in your life.

Get your free copy of the 5 Step Ultimate Guide to Stop People Pleasing here.

Coaching for Latina Leaders

About the Podcast

Leadership ability is equally distributed but opportunity to lead is not. This podcast is for all women, those that identify as leaders and those that don't, yet. You'll learn how to let go of guilt and self-doubt so you can show up with confidence everywhere you go. No more questioning if your idea is good enough to share, if it's worth it to speak up, or if you're a good enough leader. All that self-critical B.S. stops now. Listen in as masterful educator and Harvard grad physician, Dr. Vanessa Calderón, teaches you how to let go of the things standing in the way of your success as a leader. Get ready, this podcast will accelerate your personal and professional growth.

Dr. Vanessa Calderón, MD, MPP has over 20 years of leadership experience. She is a Harvard grad, ER physician, Life and Leadership coach, and a mother of 2. She's a first generation Latina and is dedicated to uplifting her community. She's the founder of the Latina Leadership Accelerator, where she uses education and coaching to support the personal and professional development of women at all stages of their lives and careers.

Leadership Accelerator

A coaching and professional development program that will help you be more effective and get more done, without stress and burnout, so you have more time for the things you love.

Learn more and join here: www.vanessacalderonmd.com/join

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81. How to make space in our days and lives for what matters

Vanessa 00:00
Welcome to coaching for Latina leaders, the only podcast dedicated to the advancement of Latinas at every level of life with your host, Dr. Vanessa Calderon, a Latina with over 20 years of leadership experience, Harvard grad physician, and mother of two.

Vanessa 00:24
Hello, everyone, welcome back to the podcast. So right before I hit record, I was doing this little dance because I realized Holy smokes, I'm on podcast episode 81. that's amazing. Most podcasts don't even last past episode 10. And I'm on episode 81. And I am so proud of myself. So as doing this little dance and celebrating myself, I thought, You know what, I should do this dance and celebrate with all of you. Because Hello, this is why I'm doing the podcast, because I love all of you. And I want all of you guys to live a life of intention to live a life of purpose to live a life where you are in the driver's seat. That's what this podcast is all about. And I'm so happy that I get to bring all of this to you. And now we are in Episode 81. Hallelujah Oh, yeah.

Okay. So what are we talking about today? Today, we are talking about making space for what it is that matters to us in life. So this episode was inspired by something that happened to me. So a few weeks ago, I was taking a prolonged trip. So prior to COVID, I used to travel for work often. And then COVID came and you know, the entire world stopped. So I stopped traveling. And now that the world is kind of coming back together, I was being really kind of selective at what I said yes to because I just wasn't being really called to travel a lot, especially when the world when everything could be done virtually. And so I was going to take a trip. And it was one of the first trips where I was going to be gone for a long time for my family from my two kids and my husband. And I was going to be gone for a first weekend putting on this amazing retreat. And then for a few days after that, because I was going to be traveling to this awesome conference.

So I was packing my bag and my bag was super full and overflowing because I had to pack for so many days in two different climates, and a bunch of supplies that needed to take because I was putting on the retreat myself. So as I packed up my suitcase, had it all ready to go. I had that done in the morning so that I could be present for the kids before I walked into school. And so my suitcase was sitting outside of the kid's room, and I had my kids ready for school. And I was calling my son to come down to put on his shoes. And he says I'm coming, I just need help. Or he said I'm coming, I'm coming to come back up the stairs to see what he's doing. And I see him in my suitcase, trying to stuff something inside the suitcase. And I was like what's going on, buddy? And he looks at me, and he's so sad. And he says he shows me this little red race car. And he says, I'm trying to put this in your suitcase, but it doesn't fit. And I said why? Why are you putting that in my suitcase? And he said because I want you to have something to remember me by when you're traveling. And then he said, and if you could bear you could also play with it. It was the absolute sweetest thing. And I was so freakin touched by his thoughtfulness. And of course, I was like, Oh, of course, we can make space for that. And so I got down on my hands and knees with him. And we found a space to make it fit. And we close the suitcase up. And I got to take it with me on my trip. And it was just such a beautiful reminder of how important it is to always make space for what matters.

So today, I wanted to talk to you about that. Because I want to make sure that you are making space in your life intentionally every day for the things that matter most to you. So how do we do that? How do we make space for things that matter? So one of the things that I think is really helpful to do is to start with the end in mind and began with the end in mind. And this is something that I learned a long time ago from Steve Covey. So if you know him, he's this Harvard grad who used to teach at the Harvard Business School. And he states that you know when you're thinking about your priorities in life, or your values in life, begin with the end in mind. So what I want you to do is I want you to think about the end of your life and how you want to be remembered. How do you want to be remembered? What will matter most to you at the end of your life? What personal relationships will you care for? Because studies have shown that the number one predictor of happiness is the quality of time we spend with people we care about and people who care about us. That is the number one predictor of happiness. So I'm going to walk you through an exercise right now. And if you are driving or walking or running or whatever it is that you do while you listen to the podcast, I want you to either take a second to do this exercise with me or flog this episode and come back to it. Or perhaps you can do it while you're going for a run or whatever it is you're doing.

Okay, so what I want you to do right now is I want you to take a second, and I want you to imagine yourself when you're 75 years old. Imagine yourself when you're 75 years old. Take a deep breath in and imagine that person. What does that person look like? What are they wearing? Where are they living? I want you to walk your 75-year-old self outside and take a seat. Maybe you're sitting on your front porch or your balcony. And I want you to look around and enjoy that beautiful view. Look around and enjoy that view of how beautiful. And now I want you to ask yourself, what matters to me? What are the things that mattered most to me? When I look back on my life, what are the things that mattered most?

As your answers are coming up for you, I want you to take a second and pause and write those things down. What are the things that mattered most? write those things down right now. Because in this short exercise, you just got super clear on the things that matter to you, for some of you might be your relationship with your significant other your children with your friends. Perhaps it's something else, perhaps it's a community that you're growing, or something that you're building, or a way that you're giving back. Whatever it is now, you know. And now that you know you know what your values are, you know what your priorities are. I want you to start looking at your day-to-day and start seeing how can I start making more space for the things that matter to me most.

How can I start doing that? So if you want help doing this for yourself, living a life well lived living a life of intention of purpose, where you are consistent every day choosing the things that matter most to you, I want you to come and join us inside The Life and Leadership accelerator. These are the types of things that we teach. We teach how to start making time for the things that matter. We do a ton of mindset work, but also the practical tools so that you can start shifting your calendar around really organizing your time, and really using your brain to its highest capacity so that you are more effective without working harder and without taking time away for the things that don't matter. Okay, my friends, again, make space for what matters. You know what it is that you matter that matters to you. Do you know what it is that you value? And if you want help doing it come join us in the Life and Leadership accelerator. Go to VanessaCalderonmd.com/join, you can read all about the program there. Alright my friends Hasta la proxima, Adios!

Vanessa 08:11
hey, if you love what you're learning, then you've got to check out my free Ultimate Guide to stop people pleasing, where I teach you a simple five-step process to stop saying yes. When you really want to say No, you'll be so glad that you did. There's a link to the guide in the show notes. I'll see you next time.